Birthdays.

I’m turning 16 in a few days. Sweet 16 anyone? No. It’s definitely not sweet. I’m not sure why but every single damn year, depression’ll take a toll on me around my goddamn birthday. There’s many reasons why I could be depressed around this time:

There’s a thunderstorm outside, my cat is outside. I’m not sure whether or not I should be laughing at this fact.
My last birthday party was a failure. I had to pay for the pizza, cake and movies. My (now) ex-boyfriend and I got into a fight that day which resulted in a few hormonal tears. Oh yeah, a punch in my new drywall too!
Mother. Dad. Little sister. 2nd oldest brother. And FRIENDS. Always. Always forget it’s my birthday. Even when they’re given a week’s notice.
My oldest brother moved out this year, the only normal person in my family who wanted to do something for my birthday.
Presents. This is a tricky subject. I don’t want to sound greedy but let’s be serious. I. Never. Get. Anything. I. Actually. Like. Or. Is. Even. In. My. Interests.
Mom bitched at me for not doing squat for Mother’s day coming up. She forgot my birthday is on the same day.
My sister is the princess in my family. She got a thousand dollar laptop for her 12th birthday and still bitches at my parents, blaming them for everything in life. She’s downstaira right now whining and crying about how they fuck up everything in her life. Oh yeah, she does no chores either.
If I even bring up my birthday with my friends, they try to avoid talking about it. Not because they have a surprise planned. But they actually, do want to avoid it. Kasheem…. Not trying to spit any names out but — Kasheem.
I have no job this year or money. Looks like I can’t take out everyone to dinner like I did for the past few bitching years.
I have to do the planning for my birthday. Otherwise no one would even celebrate it.
My sister threw a glass dish at me today, it hit the wall.

I think that suns up a lot of reasons. I’m ready for my annual mental breakdown, hopefully it won’t be in public. I’ve been skipping school for a good 4 days now, just 8 more days to go till after my birthday. Then I can come back to school. Anyways, I got to go. I barricaded my bedroom door with drawers and my dad is trying to get in. Hell to the no… 